The day I kicked a panda

Please don't tell the Chinese Government, but once upon a time, many years ago, I kicked a panda. I would like to say it was self-defence, but that would be a lie. It's a little concerning because there is a death penalty in China for killing a panda, so I imagine for a kick I could be sent down for a good few years. Herewith is my defence.

We were travelling in the remote countryside of China, to a nature reserve. We had arrived on site by tiny minibus, we had struggled to find a place to camp and in the end were forced to stay in the shoddiest hotel imaginable. The first act in that hotel was picking the leeches off our clothes and burning a beetle out of my arm. (Don't ask).

The following day, the sun was shining and the world seemed better. We paid our entrance fee and went into the panda research centre. There were about twenty pandas there in total. Pandas are endearingly cute, but sometimes unendurably dull. You may catch a glimpse of bamboo-guzzling, you may find one taking a bath, but generally they just sit.

At this particular place, there were some cages where you could get up right up close to the pandas. These were not inhumane places, as the pandas had access to large enclosures, but they could choose to sit in their 'cage'. One particular panda was very entertaining. It had learnt to somersault and was doing backwards and forwards rolls for our exclusive amusement. Until... My friend Matty was standing very near to the cage. The panda somersaulted forward and dug his claw into Matty's shoe, missing her toes by millimetres. Unfortunately, Matty couldn't pull her shoe away. I did what any hero would have done - I put my paw on the panda's foot, and pulled Matty. I freed her and the shoe, and the panda backwards rolled away, somewhat disgruntled that its prey had escaped.

So, your honour, this is how and why I kicked a panda. It's not as dramatic as it seems, really. Thus it is with long-term mission work. The idea of living and working in China can sound exotic and risky. Much of it, however, is tedious and one long slog. Nonetheless, knowing that you are in the country that God has called you to, doing the work that He wants, is normally reward enough.